Letting Go...

First steps, kindergarten, new school, new sports team, school dance, and youth camp.  They all have one thing in common.   It means letting go of the control you as a mother have with your child.   It means taking a step back and letting them stand on their own, knowing that you will be there to pick them up if they fall, get hurt, don't make friends, feel excluded, dumped by the date, or don't fit in.   This all comes together for me this morning as I prepare to send my 15 year old son to youth camp today.

Today's Saying is

" Being a mom means being over-protective.  Its genetic."

That is a powerful statement, and one that I am sure almost every mother out there can relate to.  When your child takes his first steps you're cautiously reaching your hands out to catch him if he falls, wanting to protect him from the hard ground. These first steps are repeated over and over in his life. Each and every time mom has her hands outstretched ready to catch him when he falls. While you may not physically be reaching out to catch him, it may be emotionally, or mentally, you still do it. Sometimes wondering if letting him take that first step is the right choice.  Not wanting to let go and let them make the choices, the friends, the mistakes,  that you know in your heart they will eventually make is one of the hardest things a parent can do.  As the statement says, its genetic. 

The idea of letting your child go and do something isn't always about whether or not they are ready to do it. Sometimes it is about whether or not you are ready for them to do it.  Most often YOUR not while they have been ready for a while.  I know I am not..  We know all about the problems that they could, might, and probably will encounter, and we want to protect them from the pain, heartache, bumps and bruises of life.  I think the hardest thing for us to do is to step back, fight that deep feeling of panic, and let them do whatever it is they are going to do.

Chris leaves today for a week long youth camp.
- Thankfully its a church camp, so it "should" be more in line with our morals/values/ beliefs.  But at the same time its a Co-Ed camp  for grades 7-12. So of course momma in me worries about the gender aspects.
-Then there is the fact that we don't personally know of anyone else attending this camp.  Doesn't mean that he will know NO one, but we haven't heard about anyone in particular..  So momma worries he wont know anyone, wont make friends.  
- Chris is hearing impaired.  Will the other kids accept him, will there be a social barrier between them.  Will he remember to take care of the $3000 worth of hearing instruments that he has worn since he was 4.. yes after 11 years he knows when to take them off but he is still a kid and sometimes accidents happen.  HELLO...  teenagers + lake = worry.

Wow  strangely enough I thought I was worried about more than that but after putting it down I realize the list wasn't that long.   I also realized that it doesn't matter what happens, Chris is a good kid, and things will happen as they are meant to happen.  Its time to step back and let God guide Chris.  Will it be easy?  OH heck no.   Will I stop being mom?  NEVER.. Will I not take back control when he comes home? Nope..  but I remind myself, he is still a kid, and will make his own decisions,  and he will be just fine.  

Man am I going to miss this kid.   Just think next week I get to send my daughter to camp. Now who is going to have a harder time with that one.. Me or Daddy?